I’ve been having a lot of messed up dreams this past week. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I am getting really freaked out because I am married and I have always been faithful in all of my relationships but in my dreams I’m cheating on my husband and after I wake up I feel guilty when I look at my husband. I know I’m not really cheating on him but do my dreams mean that I am thinking about it? Or is it just that I’ve been watching one of the most sexually explicit novelas of all time??? I hope it’s the latter…
In one of my dreams I am going to one of my classes and I meet a very attractive bad boy type and at first I can’t stand him because he is very arrogant but as I get to know him better I start to feel lust toward him until eventually all I can think of is how, when, and where we will be able to fool around, while my husband is working. In this dream I don’t even feel guilty about what I am doing and that is so not like me…
In another dream I am 15 or 16 and I go sleep at one of my friends house, which is also around that age. At first we talk about boys and do all that stuff teenage girls do at sleepovers and then we go to sleep. After about an hour I wake up because I need to go to the restroom and I have to pass by some rooms. As I am walking toward the restroom I see that one of the room’s door is cracked open and I see that my friend is having sex with her dad and of course I freak out and go back to my friends room. Soon after she comes back and tells me that I can’t say anything about what I saw… Then my dream changes to where I am at my house and my boyfriend picks me up so that we can go to my friends house, the same girl who had sex with her dad, because she is throwing a party. While at the party my boyfriend suddenly disappears and I go looking for him inside a room only to find my friend’s dad. As soon as he recognizes me he locks the door and tells me to get on the bed so I do and slowly he starts to get on top of me. Kissing my neck and moving his hand up my dress… And suddenly he rips my dress open leaving me with only a bra and panties… I start to freak out because I know this isn’t right but he covers my mouth and ties me up so I can’t fight him off and as things progress I start getting so wet and excited… I can’t get enough and all he is doing is sucking and biting and after that night It’s like I became his and I start to live with him and my friend… This dream freaked me out the most because when I woke I WAS horny… What is wrong with me?
I can’t stop listening to this song! I have it on repeat and get lost in the lyrics. The first time I heard this song I didn’t like it but as I listened to the lyrics it brought me back to when I was a 16 year old band geek, desparate to find love.
I did many foolish things. . . But more on that later. Till then I hope you enjoy reading my experiences and if you want to know more don’t hesitate to ask 🙂
I am so mad right now!!! Instead of fighting with my husband, which I know I’ll regret 5 mins later, I decided to try and let my anger out by sharing my experience with you. You see I believe in God, I was raised as a Catholic but as I’ve grown up I am not too sure about religion. What I am certain about is that God is real.
Anyway my husband posted a status on his facebook stating that God is cruel for letting us suffer and I strongly disagree with that. Don’t get me wrong, what got me mad wasn’t the post he wrote on his facebook, but because he got mad at me for asking him why he put it. Okay maybe I might understand why he got a bit mad, I did wake him up to ask why he felt this way. I just felt I needed to know why so I had to wake him up, but as I am writing I am realizing that maybe I shouldn’t have woken him up. I would probably be grumpy too. I tend to overreact at times, you might say that I have an issue with managing my anger. I don’t mean that every time I get mad I turn into the hulk, I just get so mad that when the person I get mad at is trying to talk to me I tend to ignore them and push them away, not literally, but after I cool down I realize that the reason I got mad wasn’t even worth me being mad and hurting the people around me. And then my husband, AJ, is so understanding he kisses me and hugs me even when I am being a bitch, which makes me feel even worse after I cool down. Like right now he was telling me to please hug him and what do I say? I tell him that I don’t want to I am seriously such a bitch. Anger is not a good feeling it just blinds me, all I see is the bad and just like a scorpion I attack.
Now that I am calm I think I am going to wake him up again 😉 … Good night! Hope to be able to share more of my experiences with you all!
If you have any questions just ask I will be honored to answer them for you (:
I was born on November 13, 1991 in Guadalupe, a city in Mexico but I have lived my entire life in the United States of America. For the first 10 years of my life I was a resident of Texas, but when my residency expired my parents decided to naturalize me to become a United States citizen.
In 2010 I graduated from High School and met the love of my life, AJ, that’s not his real name but it’ll do for now. We met in December and got married in November of 2011, I was 19, almost 20, and he was 21. Because of our age everyone was opposed to us getting married, at first I wasn’t too sure that getting married so young was a good idea but after thinking about it for a while I realized that all the doubts I was beginning to have were actually everyone else’s not mine.
Now we have been married for a year and 5 months and I hope to share the rest of our life with all of you.